OpenBSD VirtualBox

How to run VirtualBox on OpenBSD is a stupid question.

Types of Questions

There are two types of questions: „questions“ and „stupid questions“. Furthermore, the notion of „that's a great questions“ is scam, and being used among stupid men, as a quasi-rhetorical device, merely to feel about the situation, i.e. their terminal state of stupidity. In a moment, I'll address „How to run VirtualBox on OpenBSD“ i.e. an example of questions which are denoted by the latter type of question, i.e. stupid questions. In short, you can't.

When words are scarce they are seldom spent in vain; […] may boldness be my friend.

How to run VirtualBox on OpenBSD!

How to run VirtualBox on OpenBSD is a stupid question, because VirtualBox doesn't run on OpenBSD, that's all. It's very simple, STFW and you'll find out. Why anyone should ask such a stupid question, when it was addressed repeatedly on the Internet, in many shapes and forms! Unsecure men, who are begging to be loved, are always answering stupid questions. Regular people don't.

I was on the brink of losing my mind when I'd been asked that question. What happened to STFW? Blokes round the corners are whining: there's no Virtual Machine available on OpenBSD, so they can't use OpenBSD. There are many reasons why you needn't or shouldn't use OpenBSD, but that one, probably is not the good one. As if fellas have many important tasks to do, but it's not possible, unless to have a virtual machine running on their machines. Balderdash on top of balderdash.

It is the case that, there are few men on Earth, for whom using virtual machines is a necessary precondition to use an OS, but that's an exception. Running virtual machines are not as important as some might think. The presumption that the over-rated VirtualBox from creepo corpo Oraculo is somehow necessary to have things done on Linux, Windows, or whatever is dumb. Men are sitting on their you-know-what, all day and every days, doing nothing, but watching videos on the Internet, which are recorded by almost always good for nothing losers. The losers have one job: to unbox and install Linux distros.

Hey! Today I'm going to install Ubuntu on Virtual Box, and I'll share my first impressions about it with you!
SoyDev Talked.

OpenBSD Virtual Machine (Hypervisor)

First, just shut up; OpenBSD already has a virtual machine of its own; the composition is very simple: set things in vm.conf(5) and control the whole shebang with vmctl(8). We're done! But to fulfil the habit of being long-winded: there's the glorious vmm(4) driver which is singing in concert with vmd(8), the Greek daemon; and that will play the composition for you.

And there's more, stuff like virtio(4), the implementation of the VirtIO protocol. You needn't know much about the latter, but it's good to know that those things are there. In short, to run machine α on top of the machine β, the system needs to abstract devices out, in terms of virtualisation. Things like virtual memory, virtual disks, consoles, and so forth. That's the job of virtio(4) and its related subsystems, e.g. viomb(4), vioblk(4), etc.

Thus, OpenBSD has a virtual machine, hypervisor and all those related things. There are some limitations though, and to some, the most important one, is the lack of graphics. Few minutes ago, I did a quick STFW about the topic, esp. graphics. There were some talks about „X-forwarding“, etc.

However, mind you, I think I've been missing the point, right now, right here. Stop! Still, I have no idea why anyone wants to run an OS on top of another one; and all that with the grace of some GUIs. Unless, you are one of those good for nothing low-IQs who has nothing important to do with his life, but to record and upload cringe-ish Distro Hopping videos, using the trash code of OBS, well … Meh! Forget it. In the spirit of transparency, I admit I use virtual machines, but it's all about „ssh“-ing.

Distro Hopping

There's always exceptions, exceptions break the rules; rules matter. To some extend, of course! To make it clear, you may think you need to use a virtual machine, but actually, you don't. Some do, mainly in the discipline of computer security, and also those who test and debug software.

However, here, I'm not talking about those fellas. I'm talking about Normies, addressing those men who are under impression that they need Virtual Box so bad so that, to be able to distro-hop like monkeys from this tree to that tree, like some guys on streaming channels on the Internet. Dude, cheer up and get a life! You will learn nothing, merely by distro-hopping. That's not fun either. If you are bored, just pet a kitten.

Most men have this urge of installing multiple OSes on top of multiple different machines, not because they are some kind of wizards or something. No. The fact that Jacobi, son of Charlie Jacobi, thinks merely by running OpenSUSE, instead of Ubuntu for example, he will fill and cure his hollow of illiteracy, and eventually will be branded by the Redditors, as Alan Turing 2.0 is stupid.

Testing different OSes is not the way, and no, hey dude! that's not how things work. First, learn about the very thing that you've already have. Jumping from this OS to that one won't solve your problem of mediocrity; as it didn't work for Python-Devs and Soydevs of broken WordPress either. Instead, just push it harder, i.e. learn how to learn more. Meh!

Should You Use a VM? No.

I'm not in habit of using word „VM“ to refer to „virtual machines“, by the way. From my perspective, the use of abbreviation VM is ambiguous, and I only use that to connote Virtual Memory.

Moving forward, I say, most of the „where's my virtual machine“ whining-crowd needn't use a virtual machine at all. Not because it's OpenBSD, think about it. You needn't have a virtual machine anywhere, not on OpenBSD, nor on Windows. Have you managed to manage the already installed OS, on the bare-metal machine of yours yet? No? I know!

You are not a hacker. You needn't test a cryptic ELF(5)-ish piece of gibberish; stay out of that fetish. Reading some books on CEH or CISSSP won't turn you to a hacker either. If you think by watching some freako-videos, recorded by some weirdos, on those streaming channels, you would gain enough knowledge, to hack your way into Deep Blue, then you are dumb. By the way, some animals are still using term crackers, to refer to hackers, merely to mock some groups of people. Don't do that. Don't be disgusting, will you?


And here's the final point, an important one: not always, but often, if program α doesn't work on machine β, that's a very good sign that you need to use OS γ, not OS δ, which is supposed to run program α. That's what an operating system is for, what it is supposed to do, to run your programs, i.e.:

to choose an OS, based upon software you need to use, ¬ vice versa.


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