Web Sucks

I hate Web, Web sucks, and I wish it was dead.

I hate Web and everything about it. However, I'm not talking about the Internet, nor emails. That's a different story. I'm whining about the foul combination of unearthly markups with foggy styles. Let's fly off through the foggy style, and remember Duncan; JavaScript is covered in blood. They've pushed that upon us. Shame on them, shame … Wrong! You are wrong again; I'm fond of Cersei.

Soyification of Visuals

I love red heads, the natural ones, without hair highlights. They are light, the embodiment of the Sun, manifestation of the Sol on earth. Sun doesn't need to fake it. Natural; Sun hates chaos. Chaos is an abomination to The Well-Tempered Clavier. It's Blue note, chaos is the Web. There is no structure in Web. The blooming face of non-structure bites. It's a colossal chaos. A drum, a drum! Syntax Highlighting is coming. Screw you and your highlighting.

Those unstructured intersections of folded sections. It sounds like postmodernism, the maxima extrema enemy of the civilisation. The Calculus puts a leash on maxima and minima via functions, but HTML has none. It's a brute fact. HTML is fake. It was invented to warm Soydevs up. The untitled structures of titles has not got used to its new title. It was searching for a companion. Let's give rise to a heinousness, the script, the murderous and it's going to end everything.

What about style? What is CSS? Style in name only, the Soyification of visuals. It's refurbishment of righteousness. Truth is absolute, and CSS doesn't have it. It is always black and white. A man should find his way, through darkness towards the light. There's no door number three. CSS is shoehorning the idea of grayscale. Grey is a scam, and it was a mistake. A capital one. Writing styles for my own website was watching lectures on intersectional feminism. Waterboarding is overrated and Hitchens was wrong. He's never written a single line of CSS.

SEO is the HAARP of the Internet

SEO is a destruction machine, it's the HAARP of the Internet. One of many. It crawls underneath of the Web, but it's destroying the net from within. HAARP is not Harpa. I like Harpa! Unlike HAARP, Harpa is a Muse, the Muse of civilisation. SEO is the destruction machine of all meaning. SEO hates civilisation. We used to search and to find one-line answers. Being landed on a single page, with one paragraph, i.e. one-line answer. But now, the Web has been infected by locusts of SEO.

Scrolling through the endless of garbage in one page, sometime legions of pagination of pages. To what extent? To find that very single line of the answer. The notion of SEO's so-called experts has taken a dump on Internet, and they love it. Abysmal articles with countless pictures and stupid memes. Those memes and more memes. I hate Richard Dawkins. Intro, outro and movements as if, they are composers. No! That's not a symphony, and you are not a composer. You are just a blogger, another Normie in the land of King Nothing. I don't need a lecture. I don't want to hear about your background story, and don't tell my how exited you are. Just give me that very single line of answer. But, you don't have one. You are just another blogger.

Cats Hate Your New Form Factor

Then, it comes to amp and schema. Amp is not Ampere, and ampere is not Ohm. But my ohm is going to run out with thy datum. They have shoved the non-idea of JSON-LD, to ease their discrete consciousness. I've settled, but it doesn't change anything. I still hate script tag -- with or without script.

And no! There's no AI; they know that. AI was a scam from day one. They need meta, you have to give it to them, and you have to pay for it. In a proper form, of course! The sun has gone up and I have not heard the clock strike. That's why they're pushing the ML. Good luck with your AI. But don't bother me. I have cats that I have to attend to. AI is a worthless word. It's similar to the word "controversy". A word without meaning. They are journos' panhandling tool. Just another Redditor-friendly plug-word, good for marketing, good for business. Stay busy.

And finally, the bloated notion of responsive web. Let's get it straight; web1, web2 … you name it, responsiveness or whatever you want to call it. I do not care. Just build your damn PC and look at your damn monitor. The 480p was classic and it works. The 720p is good too; 1080p is the maxima limita. Everything beyond that is slippery slope. I prefer CRT -- as long as it's not "Made in GDR", but LCDs are fine too. However, not really. Cats hate them, and Felis catus is the index. Laptops are cringe and phones are not your vestigial organ. The 2G is enough, you don't need a smartphone to function. You need to get a life, pet a cat, and listen to Metal -- a heavy one.


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